How can you still love me so?

How can you still love me so?

How many times have I asked for your forgiveness, my Lord?

for all the lies I've told, hurting you with words I spoke,

losing my patience with these precious children that are yours,

for arguing with my husband, instead of letting things go,

the times I treated him badly, being distant and cold,

How can you still love me so?

I've criticized and made fun of people for the way they looked,

gossiping and spreading rumors, no matter who got hurt,

taking my anger out on my family because I was hurt first,

I was disrespectful to your people, Man I was the worst,

worshiping idols was what you disliked the most,

How can you still love me so?

Putting people and things before you was wrong I now know,

taking drugs to escape a life to hard to handle on my own,

for not taking care of my body which holds my spirit and soul,

taking for granted each special day you made to give us hope,

How can yo still love me so?

I've latched out at people when they couldn't be helpful,

and I confronted anyone who had been disrespectful,

I fought with my fists, cussed with my mouth, I was uncontrollable,

I turned away from you many times because of my sinful nature,

thinking I could live without you in a world full of anger,

I'm broken to pieces and in this darkness, I'm surrounded by danger,

How can you even stand to look at me?

and say you still love me so?

I keep doing wrong, slipping back to the ways of this world,

I despise who I am, but in your eyes, I'm worth so much more,

forgive me! I repeat over and over like a revolving door,

but you repeat to me over and over,

How much you still love me so.

Rosalinda Loy 2012